pain throws your heart to the ground
love turns the whole thing around
I know it won't all go the way it should,
but I know the heart of life is good.

Sometimes song lyrics are so true it's ridiculous.

This isn't cut and dry, there is no great divide.
There's only you and I tonight.
Wish I could read your mind, so scared of the truths I'll find,
but I know I've reached the bottom line.

How do I know of your intentions, how do I make you see?
You see, I know your stories and all the songs you've played for me.
Oh I once was lost but, how did you find me and make me see?
See that I put you on a pedestal, won't you come back down to me?

You know I've been so downhearted, you know I've been so unsure.
For lack of a better word I need you more and more.
Hold me, love me, I need your warm embrace.
Don't waste another day.

i just had to get that off my chest.
anyway, I filmed a slasher film where I was the victim today. it was surprisingly fun.

my pentax 35mm camera.

So among the plethora of things my parents crammed into the trunk of my car was my dad's old 35mm Pentax camera that I used last semester in my Beginning Photography class. I'm pretty excited about it, because I casually mentioned it to him while he was packing the car, but I never thought he'd actually part with it. I mean, he hasn't used it in forever, and I've always been fascinated by it before I even knew how to use it. Well, to make a long story short, he gave it to me. I'm so excited. I have one roll of film left from my photog class, so I'm pretty excited about putting it to use. Even though I won't have a dark room to play around with developing the pictures, it'll still be fun to start using the camera again... especially because my digital camera broke before I left California. I'm definitely looking for a solid digital camera to put on my christmas list... got any ideas? Anywho, my scarf is coming along quite nicely, and I think I'm going to go for a quick walk up the redic. hill behind my house. The things I find to do when trying to conserve gas...
Oh, and Carly, I started reading Velvet Elvis last night... I'm really looking forward to it.
I also need to figure out what I'm sending all my girls at Vanguard. It has to be creative.
wish me luck until next time...

crocheting, late walks, and football games.

Last night before I went to bed, I decided to start crocheting again. At 5am... so now I'm working on a brown and blue scarf for my friend's birthday this coming week. I'm hoping I'll be able to make it down to see her, which is the plan, but the lack of gas in the area could be a big problem... so we'll see how that goes. I really enjoy crocheting. It's so consistent. You can just stare at it for so long, and make such intricate stitches, and I don't get bored at all. It's like reading a really good book. I don't know why, but I really enjoy intricate labor intensive things. haha. Anywho, currently I'm at my friend Madelyn's house on her computer getting nice and cozy after our hour walk. It was nice because it was at night, and we took her sweet dog. It's so nice to be around dogs again... they just have an ability to make your day that much brighter just by existing in it. I was going to watch the Georgia v. Alabama football game this evening... and hopefully with a certain someone, but plans changed, and now Madelyn and I are watching the Grey's episode we missed. I still have to catch up on Heroes last week... I'm not sure I can keep up with all these shows without the convenience of DVR or TiVo. alas...
I'm trying not to lose my head these days. My heart seems to be taking over.
until next time...

much ado about nothing

there is no gas...
anywhere.
boo.
i still have 3/4 of a tank, so we'll see how far that goes.
My friend Kayd is going to fix my radiator tomorrow afternoon, so that will be good. Apparently Sport needs a little TLC. Tomorrow evening, I'm dog sitting at Erin's house this weekend while they're out of town, and next week I'm going to Athens for Barb's bday. I'm pretty excited about being busy, but it's a little scary not having lots of money and lots of gas.
I'm deliriously tired... I'm running on three hours of sleep, and I had a very busy day.

this is the song you need to sing to me:

No i'm not the man i used to be lately
see you met me at an interesting time
if my past is any sign of your future
you should be warned before i let you inside

hold on to whatever you find baby
hold on to whatever will get you through
hold on to whatever you find baby
i don't trust myself with loving you

i will beg my way into your garden
i will break my way out when it rains
just to get back to the place where i started
so i can watch you back all over again

hold on to whatever you find baby
hold on to whatever will get you through
hold on to whatever you find baby
i don't trust myself with loving you

John Mayer

Tommy Emmanuel and Anthony Snape

Look them up.
Mom and Dad went to their concert (Anthony opened for Tommy) night before last, and they both agreed it was the best and most entertaining concert they'd ever been to. I looked them up on youtube, and was amazed by Tommy's guitar playing. Apparently he was one of the first (if not the first) guitar players to play percussion rhythms on the guitar. He also has probably the most full and rich tone I've ever heard a guitar produce. Simply incredible. Anthony Snape is an up and comer from Australia, who's just starting to get recognized in the U.S. His guitar skills don't match up to Tommy's (I'm sure not many do), but he has a pretty unbelievable voice. I was pretty blown away. Anyway, look them up, be amazed, and enjoy.

P.s. Erin came home from visiting family in Kansas today, and I picked her up from the airport. It's so good having her back... and having a car. I think this is going to be a good week. Much to do, for certain, but that's how I roll.
until next time.

"i'm not that dirty..."

so I have a great story to tell.
Background: I finally got Sport this morning! I'm so excited.
Plot: My friend Kayd, a mechanic, came with me to get my car, and after following me back to the house, he was driving me back to the car I'm borrowing for the weekend. My mom called to see how everything went, and she said, "How does Sport look?", and I said, "Well, he's really dirty right now, but other than that he's fine."... at that moment, I noticed Kayd self consciously looking around at his clothes, arms, etc. and then he utters the best line ever... "Hey, I'm not that dirty yet."
hahahahaha
I almost peed my pants. He obviously had no idea that I refer to my car as a he, or that he even has a name. I quickly corrected him, and tried not to laugh too much. needless to say, he was quite embarrased. bahaha.

so in other news, I woke up at 6:30am this morning... which is always bad... and dropped the girls off at school. then i had to get their grandmother ready for the day and take her to the senior center. picked up sport, shuttled cars, took a nap, checked on g-ma, picked up girls, took to dance (30 minute drive back and forth twice), got dinner (twice), helped girls with homework, watched a movie, sent girls to bed, and now i'm having to spend another night with them because their parents won't get back until about 2am. brilliant.

tomorrow I'll see if my blood has enough iron in it to donate, unpack my fully stuffed trunk, and then pick erin up from the airport. i'm pretty excited. it's wierd going from being completely deserted and trapped in my home, to missing being there and seeing my roommates. i've been non stop all weekend!

but i'm racking up a little dough, so what can i say.... except,
until next time.

baby hats and breaking dawn

Today, I had a plan. I was going to wake up early so I could get laundry done, do dishes, etc before I had to be picked up to babysit for a couple of days. Of coarse I woke up 20 minutes before I was supposed to be picked up instead... so I threw a bag of things together, washed up, and didn't even have time to eat breakfast. Thankfully the family I'm sitting for was making french toast for lunch, so it all worked out. After the family left, I crochet'd two little newborn baby hats for my sister's baby to be. Since she hasn't even had her first ultrasound yet, I thought I'd be safe and make a brown and pink one, and a blue and brown one... even though we're all hoping for a little Owen Thomas Hamilton. Cute name right? (I'm responsible for the Owen, which I'm quite proud of). I also got a little bit if Breaking Dawn time in again... my goal is to have it finished before I pick Erin up at the airport Tuesday. My other goal is to have my freaking car before then... yep. It's still not here. I'm about to kill those guys. Other than making dinner, it was a pretty slow day. We watched two movies, crochet'd, and had fun. Tomorrow however is going to be interesting... mostly because in no way am I a morning person. I have wake the girls up at 6:30am, have them to school by 8am, give their grandma her meds and take her to the senior center by 9am, pick the girls up by 3pm, take rachel to dance at 4, go back and get charlotte for dance at 7, but drop her off 30 min early so i can pick rachel up 30 minutes late, feed them, help with homework, etc. Should be interesting...
wish me luck, until next time.